Tag: Hole

Hole and Nirvana – Dirty Boots 1990

Pinking out the black, dreaming in a crack
Satan got her tongue, now it’s undone

Sonic Youth, Dirty Boots (1990)

Every time that I stare into the sun
Angel dust and my dress just comes undone

Hole, Asking for It (1994)

“Good come in pink boxes”

The magic is in the hole

Voodoo Doughnut Slogans (2003-present)

When did Kurt Cobain meet Courtney Love? I’ve looked into this, and I don’t have an answer. Honestly, I’m not even sure when Chris and I first met, and that is because when you are into music and/or are a musician, and you are in a scene with other people who are into music and/or are musicians, you tend to know about people, especially performers, before personally meeting them. You might be in a room with the person, maybe be introduced briefly, or in someone’s orbit, part of a group conversation, etc. Then later on down the road, maybe you have the opportunity to have a longer conversation, but often it’s in a social setting with lots of other people. That’s how it was with Chris and me, and likely it was that way for Kurt and Courtney, but with the added twist of Courtney likely always had a mission and knew she had a mission. I say this because it seems clear to me now that when Courtney arrived in Portland in 1980, she was apparently on a mission to frame Chris Newman as a child rapist. It also seems clear that her father was part of that plan. Supposedly it was her father who provided her with the Owsley barrel acid she brought with her.

If it is true that Courtney had a mission with regards to Kurt Cobain, say by the mid-1980s, then it stands to reason she would have known when she first met Kurt, because she would have been paying attention, and it would have been a set up. By now I see that set ups are the rule, not the exception for people under this much surveillance and control – including Chris, me, my daughter, Kurt Cobain. This is unacceptable, by the way.

When I was running this Satyricon fan page on MySpace, as I said before, I received this at the time unpublished photo of Kurt Cobain by email which I thought was really neat. It was from Monica Nelson’s friend David Ackerman, a photographer who liked to take photos at Satyricon, and it was a performance photo from January 6, 1989.

Over time I saw more and more photos from that set eventually having access to the full collection. In one photo, I thought I recognized Courtney Love’s face looking up at Mudhoney, and sent an inquiry to Everett True about it, whom I already had had some email exchanges with, and he said that it might be her, but even if she was at the show, she was probably there to see Mudhoney, and there’s no evidence she met Kurt Cobain there. Later I realized the blonde woman in another photo was Courtney, or David told me it was her. The thing about this show is there weren’t many people there. Also, Courtney is pretty dressed up and front and center. I don’t know where she was living in 1989, but I now know she had been around my circle in Minneapolis in 1988, and in April or May of 1989 I would run into some LSD that was likely Owsley LSD – in Minneapolis. That may be nothing to do with Courtney, and everything to do with the CIA. It seemed like in the 1980s (and probably to this day) Courtney was/is always on the move with stations in New York, London, Los Angeles, etc. In the old days it included Portland, Seattle, San Francisco.

Then there’s this whole thing going on where even the most cursory contact with a person somehow earns another the “right” to file defamatory reports with the FBI. And by “defamatory” make no mistake – I don’t mean “negative” I mean full of damaging lies. For example, if I sell something to someone through the mail – the person pays me some money, and I put something in the mail to that person – or if I go and sell some musical equipment at a store – these people who engage in this simple, single straightforward transaction somehow have now earned the right make reports about me to the FBI. How this works I don’t understand. It could even be untrue, because I have no corroborating evidence. But it does seem to be true that any contact with a person whatsoever earns people, especially certain people, the right to create FBI files. So as soon as Courtney had some contact with, for example, Kurt Cobain, she could have been filing reports on him, with an agenda behind it all. And I have reason to believe that Sub Pop as a business was linked into all of this. The reason I believe this is because of how Cobain’s (Nirvana) shows were scheduled in relation to Chris’ (Napalm Beach or Snow Bud) shows – there was a parallel going on, not just in Europe but in Seattle and Portland, too. By this I mean, they typically would play the same clubs within a week or two of each other. (“I’ve been in your heart shaped box for too (two?) many weeks…”) I haven’t really shown this yet because every time I start working on collecting the data, the isht hits the fan.

I would ask myself why there would be a parallel going on. Sometimes things like this happen because there’s an occult side to this. Because the crimes are CIA and FBI linked, and police and the press are locked down (or that’s how they behave), there’s far less than usual concern about being “caught.” So there is some flaunting, display of power, going on.

The dirty plans for Kurt Cobain were, as most of these larger and more coordinated crimes are, not so much secret but covered up. I say this because I’m starting to see suggestions of something come out in videos both before and after the death of Kurt Cobain. There is the Sonic Youth video for Dirty Boots from 1990 showing a boy in a plaid shirt and a girl in a Nirvana t-shirt dramatically leaping off a stage, falling through the air. The Nirvana t-shirt has a home-made screen print look, with the word Nirvana appearing above a concentric circle radiation/target design similar to that used by Courtney on her posters for Hole. Also interesting that the t-shirt screen is red, since Cobain’s wrote his suicide note ~3 years later in red pen.

still from 1991 Sonic Youth Dirty Boots video showing girl in Nirvana t-shirt
Sonic Youth – Dirty Boots 1991

The girl in the Dirty Boots video supposedly was chosen after being seen dancing in a club in New Jersey. I suspect that there is something deliberate in that, the New Jersey link. The boy in this video seems like he had some resemblance to me during this era. His hair is the same or similar color, length, style.

Is “boots” a play on bootleg? See poster with Babes In Toyland mentioning “bootleg” and “dirty, icky clothes!!” – Is that in turn a link to the Columbo coat? And later, the cat-piss leather jacket? Another possibility has to do with Chris getting back together with Valarie in San Francisco October of 1989, the weekend before the Loma Prieta earthquake. Jan Celt had been quoted in the local music press making a comment that Chris had found gross, about how their “boots would be knocking.” In fact, just as Chris was leaving San Francisco, the bridge-buckling earthquake hit.

Later, when Chris and Valarie were living homeless on the streets of San Francisco (and it sounds like running off to San Francisco was Valarie’s idea; she’d grown up in San José) – there’s a story that I heard from both of them which is that Valarie would go dumpster diving for clothing or fabric behind a high fashion store, and the police would call her “Courtney” – like, greet her, “Hi Courtney!” I don’t know if this was a one-off or a regular occurrence but it suggests a link or parallel between Valarie Caldwell Newman and Courtney Love Cobain and that the police in San Francisco were aware of it. And it’s also linked to dumpster diving and maybe “dirty clothes.” Is the world “clothes” linked to death? (clothes/close)

Then there’s the 1992 Radiohead song “Creep.” There are different ways to listen to this song. Like, to me, maybe he’s not singing “I’m a weirdo” but “I’m a widow.” And “running out the door” is by design a mirror – meaning – either escape for the prisoners, Chris and me, or escape for the crime gang. In this case, the meaning is the latter, escape for the crime gang. And a primary strategy in this is to run out the clock – to get enough time to attack with radiation weapons and kill with cancer. This is what they need time to do, and why they always find a reason to ask for or incentivize others to accept the idea of giving us more time in captivity. Now, we should never have been kept in captivity. It is illegal, immoral, unethical, and cruel. But brainwashing and cult-like control is a huge part of this. They can make people believe or accept almost anything (they hope), and all they need to do is to keep the loop running long enough to “escape” and that in turn will give them the ability to continue the crime indefinitely (they believe). Another aspect of Creep is that the idea of it being about Courtney is probably a back side to it being about portraying me as a creep, the idea that I’m someone no one notices, that I want to be special, etc. That’s been both the manipulation around me, and the set ups, and the portrayals. I may have wished to be noticed, etc, but I never thought that I was a creep. But it’s not really about what I think, it’s about what the actual creeps project. At the end of the song they sing “run, run, RUN!” like a warning, which is, I think, what they wanted to do. To warn me, to warn Chris, to warn Kurt Cobain.

I think knowing this now, other songs like this will come forward. For example, Tom Petty’s “Into The Great Wide Open” (1991) and possibly Peter Gabriel’s “Big Time” (1987). I definitely see it in music videos that came out after the death of Cobain, like Soundgarden’s Black Hole Sun which is another mirror type song.

Back in 2014 I thought that the concept of the “hole” and the “sun” were equivalent but now I realize they are opposite. The hole represents death and darkness, while the sun represents truth.

It’s also pretty obvious, looking at this, that there’s a link between Courtney Love and Voodoo “the magic is in the hole” Doughnut, the spiral on the voodoo doll style doughnut being a link. The spiral may be worth its own entry.

I do see that in the Dirty Boots video it’s less a spiral than concentric rings, and I suspect this has to do with the acid test I would be put through on June 8, 1991, on the Klamath River (one year to the day, as it turns out, before the release of Faith No More’s album Angel Dust). The target shape looks like a topographic map.

As it appears on the t-shirt, it could be a vinyl record, a mountain peak, or a hole.

Mysteries that could potentially be cleared up with access to Chris’ stolen materials

I’ve shown how some of my journal entries seem to have made it into popular songs including Soundgarden’s “Black Hole Sun,” Smashing Pumpkins “Bullet With Butterfly Wings,” and Nirvana’s “Sappy,” but in fact there are many more instances. In some cases there are incidents that happened that may not have had associated journal entries, or it’s just a phrase taken from my journals, so that it’s harder to make the case. This would include Hole’s “Asking For It,” and Nirvana’s songs “Very Ape,” “Pennyroyal Tea,” and “Something In The Way” (this is just off the top of my head). With regards to Chris, there are links to Nirvana’s “Very Ape” and to “Heart Shaped Box.” And then there are things like Leonard Cohen’s “Famous Blue Raincoat” which doesn’t reference a journal entry, but is pretty clearly a reference to a photo that was stored in an album along with a lock of my hair. What do you do with that? I don’t know because I’m not a lawyer and so far, lawyers are all afraid to touch this.

There are things I know, but cannot prove, like John Lennon putting a lick of mine into the beginning of the song “Woman” – it’s the suspended riff used in the intro, behind the phrase “for the other half of the sky.” Even though I was a child, I was already playing guitar and I played this suspended lick over and over and over. It’s not that this is actionable in court or that I would want to take it to court, but that it’s like a hidden message. That said, looking at what’s happened to us, I think that some of the more obvious stuff should be under consideration for court cases.

Chris played a lot more guitar than I did over the years, performed and recorded, and his style was copied in a lot of ways, including, I would say, in the theme song of “Magnum P.I.” (possibly a sources of the Zoolander joke about “magnum”). But that’s just style – people copy styles all the time. The reason I bring it up is because the same people profiting from the copying Chris’ style will turn around and say Chris as an artist wasn’t worth a damn.

I’ll note here that I’ve seen hints that the guitar player for The Carpenters took inspiration from Chris’ guitar playing. This would have been in the early 1970s.

Music-wise, the feel of Nirvana’s “Lithium” seems to have been inspired by Chris’ song Pugsley, and this is repeated again in PJ Harvey’s “Meet Ze Monsta.” And if I could access Chris’ archival materials – journals and tapes and that sort of thing, I suspect I’d find a lot more. So the thefts that have happened over the years were just not property thefts, as well as intellectual property thefts, but evidence tampering. This idea that all this crime can somehow be justified with libelous stories collected and distributed by the FBI is beyond absurd. Theft is theft and libel is libel and the repeated pattern is of crimes (theft, libel, medical malfeasance, kidnapping, assassination) committed specifically in order to cover up other crimes (theft, sex trafficking, child trafficking, medical trafficking, nonconsensual human subjects research, malfeasance, graft, murder) along with various other tactics and techniques like control of focus. The depravity of all of this, not to mention the criminality, senseless waste, and stupidity, is honestly, for me, almost beyond comprehension. I think anyone in my position would want to see the perpetrators of this collection of crimes, regardless of who they are, held accountable under the criminal statutes of this nation, same as they themselves do to others. They should not be permitted to kidnap and murder their way out of everything.

With regards to intellectual property theft, a lot would probably be cleared up by access to what must be mountains of stolen journals and other creative materials from Chris’ lifetime. In some cases, Chris was performing songs for years before recording them. Someone recently uploaded a bootleg to YouTube of a Napalm Beach performance from New Years Eve 1985 at Satyricon in which they perform a song called My Master Calls, a song that would not be recorded until 1993’s Curiosities, eight years later. At first I thought that the performance couldn’t have been from 1985 because of the presence of that song, but it later became clear that for whatever reason, the song had not been recorded in the studio until years later. In addition, there seem to be songs that show up on live recordings and bootlegs that were never recorded including in 1982, “Into The Sky” (among the inspirations for Nirvana’s 1993 song “Very Ape”) and a 1986 performance of a song called “Mercury” that was uploaded by Mike Lastra. Chris for whatever reason was ambivalent about both these songs, though I think both of them are good songs. (In the case of “Into The Sky,” Chris said, ironically, that “They didn’t seem to like it in Seattle.”)

When I met Chris in 2009 he either had never heard the 1994 Mazzy Star song “Fade Into You” or he had just recently heard it for the first time. Something I noticed, that he never mentioned to me, was the similarity between the Mazzy Star song and his song Crippled Mind. I don’t know when Chris wrote Crippled Mind, and I didn’t think to ask, because this was before I knew anything about surveillance or intellectual property thefts – I’d seen things I thought were weird coincidences. He recorded Stoned and Alone in 1996 under what seems like almost desperate circumstances. Now of course I wonder how long he was playing the “Crippled Mind” chord progression at home or in performances, unaware he was under this kind of surveillance. But he wrote his lyrics in his journals, and that is one reason the journals are important to unravelling mysteries like this.

(track info available on Soundcloud)

What happened to the Pacific Northwest Music Archives Facebook Group?

The Facebook group that I had been interacting with, writing about here, called Pacific Northwest Music Archives has made some changes. It’s no longer accessible to me, which means they likely blocked me, but more than that, it is no longer publicly accessible. So it’s possible that it’s still viewable to someone logged into Facebook who isn’t me. I’m curious, so I’m looking into it.

If they blocked me and changed the settings on the group, I wonder why. Was it because of my posts/comments on the site itself, or was it because of what I’ve been writing here? Or a little of both?

I have learned to be a bit tenacious because there is so much misdirecting and control of focus. When they say “there’s nothing to see here” I admit, it just makes me look harder.

Also, let’s step back for a moment – although the site is about music in general, the focus is on late 1980s and early 1990s grunge era. And the whole vibe of that is supposed to be not taking anything too seriously, and being rebel rock n’ rollers, etc. There’s a lot of tough guy posturing as in we rock really hard and so on. Yet this same group can’t tolerate a little bit of inconvenient truth?

Here’s what I’m seeing and trying to get across – this idea that music doesn’t really matter and this is just a do-your-own thing good time for everyone is patently false. To quote the Butthole Surfers in Pepper, “there’s big money on the line.” But more than that – look at what I’ve been talking about. I’ve made allegations of surveillance based sex trafficking, including involving children. I’ve made allegations of massive hospital malfeasance including child abuse, nonconsensual human subjects research, and murder. I’ve made allegations of intellectual property theft on a global scale, of a global conspiracy to cheat, rob, and murder a musician – or a group of musicians, and I’ve also alleged that this whole thing directly involves Sub Pop and the FBI.

And they’ve been telling me it’s no big deal.

still from Katy Perry "This is how we do" video showing Katy in 1920s bob haircut with giant pearls around her neck, in a bathtub full of pearls, dark rose colored lips and nails
“This is no big deal” 2014

March 1989

Bullet with Butterfly Wings / Black Hole Sun

March 1989
18 March 1989 journal entry
compare to lyrics / video for Smashing Pumpkins 1995 “Bullet with Butterfly Wings”
18 March 1989
March 1989 journal entry, drawing of a black sun

In the previous entry, I wrote about some of the set ups that were going on in 1989 and I showed a journal entry about a dream from March 13, 1989. I said that I thought these two entries seemed to link to two songs that came out in the 1990s: Bullet With Butterfly Wings by Smashing Pumpkins (October 16, 1995); and Black Hole Sun by Soundgarden (May 13, 1994)

So both of these songs came out shortly after the death of Kurt Cobain, and shortly before Chris Newman ended up living on the streets.

The songs are, I believe, about the desire for truth to be squashed by lies. Specifically, it’s about enacting a strategy of slander, and violent acts to “fix” or get away with other crimes linked to finance and violence, including sex trafficking, nonconsensual human subjects research, murder.

Because Chris and I represent the place of the sun, Black Hole Sun must be specifically about turning the sun into a hole, imagery used to indicate murder. (Often it sounds like the actual lyric is “black old sun.”)

The strategy is to create a false profile via a series of set ups, cover ups, lies, and piles of libelous paperwork inaccessible to us. Some of the paperwork I have been able to access, and that would be the falsified, colorized, and libelous medical records. This is used as justification for covert biomedical torture and murder by the FBI and CIA. This is why there are clusters of premature deaths of certain types in certain communities.

The reason people are dying is because the US government is allowing the FBI and CIA to finance and conduct this activity.

smoke covered sun
2 Sept 2022 Portland, Oregon

Sub Pop, Honeytraps, Minneapolis

Got a uncle name George
Horny motherfucker always down to orge
Freaky motherfucker wanna Georgie Porg’
Treat a big booty like a smorgasbord
Freaks on the floor, freaks on the floor
How many of y’all freaks on the low?
Freaks on the floor, freaks on the floor
How many of y’all freaks on the low?

Ice Cube, New Funkadelic (Everythang’s Corrupt 2018)

Something that is increasingly clear is that a number of people linked to the Sub Pop orbit have been directly involved in obtaining and distributing surveillance footage of a pornographic nature of me, Chris, and my daughter, including when my daughter was a child.

It’s also increasingly clear that Sub Pop’s plans for world domination were well underway by the mid-1980s, and that, true to their name, they included a lot of underground shenanigans. The name Sub Pop evolved from Subterranean Pop. While both “Sub” and “Pop” could have a number of meanings, one meaning of “pop” is a father (dad). So one translation of Sub Pop may be “underground dad.” I believe that “dad” is code for FBI and CIA. (This might help explain “infrared riding hood” Tad?)

Finally, it is clear that ex-honeytrap Mike may be a linking person between my daughter’s family in northwestern California and Sub Pop. It is important to remember that when Mike and I started going out in July 1984 I was barely 16 and he was 21.

So if we rewind back to 1988, that is the year a lot of pieces were falling into place for Sub Pop. Meanwhile, in my world, Mike was in Thailand in February 1988, I think doing deals for a silver jewelry importer he worked for at the time, called Tomás Jewelry. Then Mike returned to the US, and flew to Minnesota where he lived with me. We lived in the St Paul Midway district between June and November 1988 when Mike announced that he was tired of Minnesota and didn’t want to deal with winter, so he would go back to California. I was in college and couldn’t really follow him. We had already had a long distance relationship in the past so it didn’t seem that weird to me to revert back to that.

But something else happened that summer. That was the summer my friend and neighbor, Bret Ellis Bowman was hit by a car. That happened on June 27, 1988. For a number of reasons I believe that situation is also somehow linked to the origin of Sub Pop, something that I expect will come up again.

What I didn’t know is that when Mike Payne left Minneapolis/St Paul in November 1988, is I was about to become the target of a series of set ups involving more honey traps (multiple honey traps it looks like now), and LSD.

The LSD seems to have been connected to San Francisco, and may have even been connected to Courtney Love, or to Courtney Love and Mike Payne. This reminds me also, there are two SF Bay Area linked Mikes in this – Mike Payne and Mike Patton – but as far as I know, Mike Patton wasn’t anywhere around Minneapolis.

Anyway, apparently Courtney Love was in Minneapolis about this time, and that fact seems to be something that was pretty well covered up until recently – specifically, exactly when Courtney Love was in Minneapolis used to be obscured, but it now appears it was 1988.

Another thing about this is Courtney Love, when she was in Minneapolis, was apparently a pal of a person I considered my best friend at the time, Erika Schlaeger. That makes Erika Schlaeger a potential linking person between Mike Payne and Courtney Love, as she knew both of them. In fact, Mike, who had been studying jewelry and metal smithing, had made a silver ring with an onyx stone, square shaped or cabachon style, that in 1988 Erika had purchased from him for $80 – that looked similar to a ring worn by Kurt Cobain in the March 1994 photo session with Youri Lenquette.

So Courtney and Erika were pals, according to Erika, but I never met Courtney.

According to my memory, journals, etc the post 1988 set ups sort of went in this order:

  1. Honeytrap Andrew Lopas “street poet from Los Angeles” – March 1989 set up – The set up with Andrew Lopas I now realize appeared in rather precise detail in dreams going back to early 1988 – in those dreams he was described as being a combination of “Pete Townshend” and a few other people. This is I think because part of his job was to put down my musical ability and psychologically smash my guitar. Erika S introduced me to Andrew L.
  2. Encountering Owsley “Sunshine” blotter-style LSD at a party. The party was held by a girl who knew Andrew Lopas. I remember at this party she was dressed all in metallic silver. Like, wearing a metallic silver dress. Erika introduced me to the guy with the LSD. Before it happened, I had a dream about eating “bubblegum LSD” and asking if it was “diluted” (word play, I think – diluted/deluded – hinting at this plan to frame me as delusional).
  3. Teenage honeytrap “George.” This seems like something I need to address again?

When my relationship with Mike fell apart I went into a spiral of sorts. Conveniently, I had also just turned 21, so I drank a lot and had a couple of gross sexual encounters. They were with guys my age. I also had platonic guy friends who were drinking buddies, including a guy who shows up in my journals as Paul Stein (I guess it’s his real name). On March 13, 1989 – exactly 20 years before I got together with Chris – I recorded a dream.

 13 March 1989 dream page 1

There is a lot going on in this dream. Plus the dream symbols from this time usually seem to have about three different meanings. I’m talking about dreaming in code, not symbols. The looping snake drawing after the dream was just something I did because I was into things like yin/yang and Carl Jung and stuff. Looking at it now, I suppose people who were all up in my business (reading my journals) made it into something sexual, and something racial.

I don’t remember the man from Africa I mention meeting (in real life). The part about the car door among other things is a link to how my future daughter’s paternal grandmother died in 1968 – the story was that she fell out of a moving car, because she leaned up against a door. But this is probably also about all the set ups and planned defamation and the idea of us trying to get out of a trap and people linked to cars (finance) using these stories to try and get us killed by the FBI/CIA – who are the ones who instigated the set ups to begin with.

Regarding “ripped jeans” – I now think anything with the word “rip” is a coded death reference, and I think others know the meaning of jeans better than I – it’s about financing someone, linked to the color blue – so that suggests reporting stories to the FBI for money, and probably specifically manufacturing untrue stories for dirty money. It’s deliberately deadly, illegal, and treated as a game.

I say that in the dream, I had forgotten my fake ID. I had this dream just before my 21st birthday. I had an older girl’s ID that I sometimes used to get into bars. But Chris’ early 1980s band the Untouchables had a song called Fake I.D. (I don’t think I’ve ever heard it) and the idea of Chris being evoked in this dream is really interesting because he had once said that Tim Brook’s of the Blue Gallery put the Satyricon “ripped jeans” crowd down – and they also started calling Chris’ bands “bar bands” as an insult.

The man I’m flirting with in this dream is an adult, probably older than me.

A couple pages later, there’s an entry that looks like it’s the inspiration for Smashing Pumpkins song “Bullet With Butterfly Wings,” and 3-4 pages after that is an entry that looks like an inspiration for Soundgarden’s “Black Hole Sun.” (I’ll post these later.)

During this period of time, my friend Erika Schlaeger was sometimes hanging around with a fifteen year old black boy who I call George in my journals. I don’t remember if that’s his real name. It’s probably made up. By this time I was living with a roommate in Dinkeytown, Minneapolis. There was a neighborhood coffee shop called Gioccos where we would hang out, drinking coffee. That’s where I would see Erika with George. It seems like he was homeless, couch surfing. Maybe she was letting him stay with her.

So he was 15 and I was 20 when I met him, I think, and mostly I just saw him with Erika at Giocco’s. The last time I saw him is the time I wrote about in my journal, when I was 21. From the very beginning, George was overtly flirtatious with me, acting like he was in love with me and wanted to be my boyfriend. I never took it seriously. To me he was a boy (not a grown man).

One day I ran into him at Giocco’s and then we took a walk to the river, and I wrote about it in my journal, as far as I can remember, pretty much exactly like it happened. It was nothing sexual. He kissed me on the cheek and that was the last time I saw him.

It sounds like the way the journal entries stack up, that the black man in the dream from 3/13/1988 was supposed to link to George. Based on some of the references in that dream, it appears that there may be some kind of link between “George” and Sub Pop. With all of his scars, George bore the signs of a “butterfly” – a person who’s trauma is leveraged and weaponized, covertly, via techniques in use by FBI and CIA. The dream that seems to link to George has references that I would now call “smashing guitar” references, which have to do with ways that people tried to sabotage Chris’ and my ability to play music, including by trying to break our spirits. That’s part of the “ripped jeans” reference. There are things about the way this stacks up, also, that suggest links between George and Andrew Lopas – the idea of a person who is a combination of other entities. Andrew Lopas, George, and Courtney Love were all linked to Erika Schlaeger. Erika also knew Kat Bjelland and all the girls in Babes In Toyland. So that means that Erika Schlaeger knew at least two people who had been friends of Chris in Portland – Courtney Love and Kat Bjelland.

With regards to the song references (I’ll put those journals in a subsequent entry) – Black Hole Sun by Soundgarden and Bullet With Butterfly Wings by Smashing Pumpkins – it looks like a reference to Courtney Love (Hole) and maybe that Sunshine LSD. And there’s the word “black” and the word “pain” which I think, at least in this time period, is always a play on Payne. Chris had a heroin dealer named Scotty Payne, who died, I don’t know how, around 2017. A question I have is how does Smashing Pumpkins show up in this part of the tapestry. In fact, a question I have is how and when did Courtney Love meet Billy Corgan? I guess Smashing Pumpkins are from Chicago and there is a lot of interchange between Chicago and Minneapolis so it might have been that.