What’s in a name (part 2) Green Pajamas, Brown Towel

This is one of those things that people will say is a minor detail or I don’t know but it’s bothering me so I’m going to write it out. I suspect it’s not such a minor detail and it may intertwine with something else.

In the 1980s it looks like there were at least three bands in Seattle with the word “Green” in their names – Green River, Green Pajamas, Green Ice. I could go down a whole rabbit hole with the word green but I’ll just say that it seems like it’s widely understood to be historically linked to magic and witchcraft (the green knight), alchemy (the green lion), and more recently, mind control including use of directed energy weapons. I am a bit fascinated by who has green eyes (I have green eyes and so do Courtney Love and Kathleen Hanna I think) and I don’t have enough information to draw any conclusions about that but I do know, again, based on patterns, that frequency-based manipulations are done on babies in utero. Based on patterns, also, I know that when I was born, my mother’s labor was induced by this technology, and so was my labor (in short, they use the tech to force your water to break). This isn’t my main point here so I’m not going to do a full argument but there’s pattern-based evidence for this.

Ever since I was a small child, if someone asked me what my favorite color was, I’d say it was green. In my mind, it was because I had green eyes.

I have read two books focused on the life of Kurt Cobain, the book by Charles Cross “Heavier Than Heaven” and the book by Everett True, “Nirvana: The True Story.” Chris bought Azeraad’s older official biography and read it, but I’ve never read that one. I’ve seen movies like Kurt & Courtney and Francis’ Montage of Heck (Heck is a name in my paternal grandmother’s family tree and I am certain this is related. It’s hard to avoid tangents – but my Seattle Grandma Helen Meyer, a nurse at Swedish Hospital, seems to have been important.)

Anyway, in one of these biographies, I assume it was True’s, there is this mention of Kurt getting married to Courtney wearing green pajamas. I say I assume it was True’s biography because I tried to find the reference this morning and couldn’t find it in Everett True’s book, but I found a description in Charles Cross’ book, and in Charles Cross’ book Cobain got married in blue plaid pajamas (p 234). I’m sure there are photos and I assume both True and Cross looked at photos and perhaps they interpreted the colors of the pajamas differently, or maybe they were making some other point, I really don’t know.

But in the background of all of this, I was trying to figure out how to interpret and talk about the early band names Nirvana was using. In order to figure out how to do that, I had looked at Nirvana’s early show history, and how they were being billed early on. According to livenirvana.com, their first performance was in December 1985 supporting the Melvins at Spot Tavern in the town of Pacific Beach Washington (a coastal town with a population of 291 according to the 2010 census) – as Fecal Matter. Their second show was on May 3, 1986, in Olympia at Gessco Hall, also supporting the Melvins, this time with the name Brown Towel. Their third show was in Aberdeen, under the name Stiff Woodies. After that they called themselves Skid Row until late June 1987.

from LiveNirvana.com

All three of these early band names seem, at least to me, to have some connection to me. I don’t know how interesting this is. Fecal matter is a weird one and might come up later in another context so I’m not going to talk about it right now. Stiff Woodies, same thing. Actually I’ll cover that here –

The first poem I ever wrote (I was probably 8 years old), went like this:

I had a wooden doll
she had a wooden bed
upon her wooden pillow
she lay her wooden head

I also had an Uncle Woody. He lived in Minneapolis, and was married to a woman named Millie. She eventually died of cancer (likely was assassinated) and he died of tuberculosis (definitely was assassinated). The idea the name “Millie” (and millipede) is that it relates to millions, as in a million dollars. The million dollars is a reward for helping to bring about murder – likely the murder of me and/or Chris by setting us up, creating these salacious FBI files. Lots of people are involved in this and hoping to cash in big time, and it’s obvious there’s already been a ton of money flowing around it.

My daughter had a cousin named Woodsie who died in a car crash. He was also murdered, and I know this because I’d had a premonition in a dream. While he was alive, Woodsie had come into conflict with a local timber company over harvesting rights on or near his land.

The name Stiff Woodies and actually a lot about Kurt Cobain’s art suggest that he had a pretty solid inside scoop on covert activities of this type. In recent years, I’ve had many dreams about Kurt Cobain. The only thing I really know for sure is his maternal family has been involved in covert activity for a long time. This is also true of Courtney Love’s family (both her mother and father). And it’s true of my family, Chris’ family, and my daughter’s father’s family. These families tend to intermarry I guess.

This is confusing and hard to figure out since no one admits to any of this. But something fairly unique about Cobain is he seemed to be aware, or at least to express his awareness, of medical malfeasance, and at the same time, he was clearly the subject of some pretty brutal medical malfeasance.

That brings me to the name Brown Towel. The story around this, for me, is actually pretty impactful. When I was in kindergarten at Freshwater School in the village of Freshwater, California our days were structured so that we had snack time, then nap time. After nap time was story time. For nap time, we all had brought a bath towel from home, and we’d lie down on the floor of our kindergarten classroom on these towels. The kids were all proud of their towels and they ahd all these different colors and designs. I was very excited and wanted and expected to bring with me a deep blue and green sort of paisley-design towel that I thought was very pretty, and I remember my mom telling me I wasn’t going to bring that towel, because that was one of her her good towels. She gave me a plain brown towel to use. So I was disappointed, but basically, this is how I was treated throughout my childhood. At the end of nap time, our teacher would normally say “nap time is over, put away your towels.” However, one day we had a substitute teacher, and that teacher decided to end nap time this way “Every child with red on their towel, get up and put your towel away. Every child with blue on their towel, get up and put your towel away” and so on. She went through all the colors of the rainbow, but she never said anything about the color brown. Eventually, I was the last one lying on the floor on a towel while all the other children were gathered around the teacher for story time. The teacher brought out a book and began to read a story. I’m still lying alone on this brown towel. Then the teacher says, “oh! Everyone with a BROWN towel get up and put your towel away.”

This was the beginning of excluding me, treating me badly. It became amplified after about fourth grade, and there were similar incidents to this, becoming more and more traumatizing. There were other ways that I was separated out from other students, sometimes under the guise of something positive (teacher’s pet) – and I was often complimented on being silent and not making waves. Punk rock is what changed that for me and in that sense I saw punk as something redemptive and life saving. Little did I know it was just another vehicle of manipulation. But at the time I was introduced to punk rock I needed the life-affirming energy it offered.

Do I think that that my brown towel trauma was related to Cobain’s naming his band brown towel? Yes, I do. Because there are other references in his songs that directly relate to minor traumas of this type that I experienced during childhood. Being “hosed down” (Paper Cuts), being burnt on the arm with a cigarette “by accident” (Sliver), etc.

So the obvious question is how would Cobain know that all of these things were happening to me, and an ancillary question is, is it possible that some of all of these things were to HIM. I suspect that some of these things did happen to him, but I don’t know. It does seem like he knew that these were deliberately induced traumas.

Sometime in 2019 I concluded that there had been surveillance in, and distributed from, Freshwater School when I was a student there. Based on hints I’ve seen in movies, it seems it was distributed to people working in the entertainment industry. Based on patterns, I can conclude that there was surveillance trafficked from inside the classrooms, and from around and most likely from inside the girl’s and boy’s bathrooms.

This would not have been going on without the US federal government’s seal of approval. What is really remarkable about all of this is that people seem to be willing to engage in these kinds of behaviors, and even to fight to continue these behaviors, but the thing that really freaks them out is the idea that someone will openly discuss, or expose these behaviors – the deliberate traumatizing of children, the surveilling of children in private spaces like bathrooms, and the manipulation of children. As for why parents and teachers would take part in this, it seems to be a combination of conditioning, herd mentality, and financial incentives.